BOYWORLD

In reference to my non existence (of late) in blog world...

WELCOME to MY BOYWORLD ....

Last week:
Reed, who JUST turned FIVE, tells someone at school (shamefully an adult I'm afraid) that they have a big bootie. Yes, my friends, you ARE reading correctly. This was topped a few days later at his BAPTIST pre-school by his pulling his shirt collar down to expose his chest. When asked by his sweet teacher, Ms. Renee, "What are you doing, Reed?" He plainly and matter a factly answers, "I'm flashing people." GOD is the ONLY one who knows where in the world he heard the word "flashing" (probably Spongebob...who Craig defends vehemently...anyway). I assured Ms. Renee that this to the core CATHOLIC family was NOT teaching baby Reed about how to get beads at Mardi Gras.

Lord, have mercy.

This week:
Cole, who just turned EIGHT, decided, partly because "someone told him to" and partly in curiousity, to flood a school bathroom (at lunch) by repetitively flushing a urinal. He was caught by another 2nd grade teacher who decides to "hand him over" to his own teacher for discipline. (bad move) Miss Griffin ROCKS, in Cole's words, and I think his sincere tears and sobs tugged at her amazing heart. Not so for mom. It's one thing if your teacher sends you to the principal...but WOW, far, far worse when your MOTHER takes you there. Upon arrival in Mrs. Russell's office, Cole had trouble even getting the sincere apologetic words out of his mouth due to the flood of emotions. He finally succeeded, and later at home wrote four apology notes...one to the teacher who caught him, one to Miss Griffin, one to our principal, Mrs. Russell, and one to Mr. Ramon, the janitor (whom Cole felt didn't need one "cuz it all went down the drain anyway, Mom.")
Christ, have mercy.

Yesterday:
As we leave LATE for our daily drive to school, Mike phones to let us know that Craig's lunch is sitting on the kitchen table, and his phone is in his room. In this day and age...and especially at Jesuit, your main "line" to your children is through texting. Not having a phone means you have no idea when mom/dad have arrived at the school to pick you up for the day. Craig waits daily...mainly because I can not leave MIS until 4. I arrived yesterday at 4:20. At FIVE, I get out of the van with the boys (almost permanently damaging the van door as I slammed it shut) to go on an UNWANTED and UNPLANNED Jesuit scavenger hunt for Craig. Like Mary and Joseph who were looking for Jesus, I should have known. At 5:15, I arrived at the place. Studying? no Meeting with teacher? nah Library? no! No, no, no, just playing computer games on the computer in the lab. Upon seeing me, and my raging angry face, you would think that would EJECT you out of your seat. Nah, just a, "Hey mom, I'm gonna finish this level and then I'll be out there." We arrived home THAT night at 6:40.

Lord, have mercy.

You know, I try often to put things into perspective and count my many blessings! I mean, at least Cole hadn't set off the FIRE ALARM at school like his Dad did back in the day, right??? And, at least Reed is still noticing attributes of others (and, I say still because his proud daddy posted a long time ago about his comments he made about one of the summer Olympic gymnasts ...well, yeah, you just have to have read it)!! Too bad, though, that Cole doesn't mop floors or scrub toilets here at home, and Reed seems to be blind to the large mound of various toys left all over....

I'll leave you with this poem by Jayne Jaudon Ferrer:

The Boys Club

We know who we are.

Ours is like one of those

ancient, fraternal orders

whose identifying rituals include

elaborate hand signals and

mysterious primal grunts.

In public,

the cue is often a series

of short, repetitive barks:

"Sit down!"

"Give me that!"

"Come here!"

"NOW!"

People who aren't in the club

look disdainful, annoyed,

disgusted, or smug.

But fellow members grin-

slowly at first, as they

identify and empathize-

then broadly, as they

catch your eye and

nod slightly to acknowledge

well-known phrases and

familiar responses.

"Boys are somethin', aren't they?"

And, you know, they are. They are my world, and I wouldn't trade a single solitary part.

~that's where I've been...just sayin'.

The Day

Days are important. So important in fact, that God told us to count them. So much of what we do and celebrate in the world revolves around a day. And you know, we're possessive of them, at times waste them, hate some, love some, and then hold on to them for dear life. Life changing events have happened to me in this winter month of January....first...the birthDAYS...Ian, Reed, Karen, Dawn, Jacob, Steve, Cole, Emily, Ellis (or as we call her Mei-Mei), Caroline, and Ethan. Insane! Eleven family birthDAYS in one month! My parent's "Get Married DAY" was in January. Equally powerful to the births in this month are two (as Tod used to call it when he was wee little) Happy Heaven Days. The first came twelve years ago today. Emily, my niece, joined the angels in heaven while nestled inside mommy....and although this day was her physical arrival to us (and not the actual day she passed away) I will forever count this day as her Heaven day. The second came just four short years ago...and depending on when I finish this post...tomorrow (which is M-n-M's birthday! ). It still consumes me at times, and I imagine that will never change. To honor her, we spread mom's ashes in her favorite beach spot two years ago, and flew kites which mom had never done in her life. Today, Brad, Dawn, Alex, Dylan, Colin, Ethan, and Karen will return to her beach spot to fly kites again....it's now a tradition on her DAY.

We lift our kites to you...and know...
that even though the winds of time blew hard enough to take you from our arms, you can rest assured they have never, ever taken you from our hearts.

Practically perfect in every way.
I love you. I miss you.

Flying is the coolest thing in the world...next to shaving.

Like most guys, I shave every day before I go to work. Since our master sink is still out of commission, I shave in the boys’ bathroom. This means I have a steady flow of kids coming through to brush teeth or use the toilet while I shave, no problem…

A few weeks ago we were all getting ready for the day. I see Reed in the laundry room, facing the wall. I tell him to keep moving, we need to go soon. Next thing I know he’s laying on our bed kind of curled up, back to me. I tell him to get up and finish getting ready, dang it! Well, he stands up and I immediately notice a big wet spot in the front of his pants. Ummm, Reed? What happened here? He is not one to share an embarrassing moment easily, so I prod and push until I determine what happened. I had noticed him watching me shave that morning. He was standing at the toilet and intently watching me shave. As he explained the wet spot on his pants, it all came clear. He wandered into the bathroom, went to the toilet and took care of business. The only problem was that he was so enraptured by my shaving that he forgot to pull down his pants before he took care of business! Now that is focus, my friends.

Kim had a great idea and bought Reed a Cars shaving kit for Christmas. I am happy to report that Reed’s face is as smooth as a baby’s bottom and his pants are as dry as the desert!

Nativity

I do love Christmas. Although I’ve noticed that I don’t see nearly as many Nativity scenes as I used to. Now, I understand that the “separation of church and state” crowd has had them effectively banned from public buildings (I could go on for pages about this topic alone!), but even in yards and private buildings you just don’t see it any more. I don’t know about you, but an inflatable elephant in a Santa hat does not really say Christmas to me.

Kim and I try to raise good Catholic, Christian kids. We go to church on Sunday, kids in Catholic school, talk about Bible stories, discuss theology with the older ones, prayers at meals, bedtime, for sick friends, etc. and we still need to take time to emphasize the Christmas Story (not the one with the leg lamp). We take extra time to remind them why we celebrate and what the true meaning of Christmas is. That’s what got me thinking about the Nativity scenes. How many children don’t know the true meaning, aren’t told the amazing story of Mary’s faith, have no idea what a manger is? It really saddens me that our country is losing its’ Christian heritage. I don’t realize it most of the time because our friends are pretty much church-going, Christian people, but when I look around at the way society as a whole looks at this most important of days, it gives me the willies. It also makes me think about the early Christians who were persecuted and martyred for their faith. They certainly wouldn’t have backed down because a statue of a baby in a manger “offended” someone. Maybe I’m just rambling here, but it’s been on my mind. Anyway, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Gifts

Isn't it amazing the way gifts "touch" others? I mean, the most simple "no big deal" gifts are often the most moving, meaningful gifts that we receive. Children often show us that. We parents spend an insane amount of money on presents throughout the years...and what do they love??? Banging the pots and pans with spoons....or playing with the wooden characters of our nativity sets! And, some of the best gifts ever are the ones that we did not have on our list, but someone thought "they'll LOVE this!" I have countless presents that I have been given over the years that truly have moved me beyond words. One of those came a few years ago from one of my closest friends. She gave me a glass angel ornament with the following inscription:

"Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy."

Even typing those words brings tears to my eyes, and honestly, takes a little of my breath away~ still. You see, Brittney, that angel ornament gift did and continues to touch me. I will always view the stars a little differently now. And Mom, I long for you to be here with us...especially during this, your favorite holiday season. I remember the house was always DECKED out. Real Christmas tree...with RED bows...beautiful ornament balls, along with many wooden ornaments...and of course, those which we made. Every Snow Village figurine made was set up in the hallway. Christmas floral arrangements on the dining room table and hearth. The nutcrackers, music boxes, the music, snow globes, wrapping paper, Christmas movies, bows, scotch tape, gift tags, Christmas cookies, tissue, tinsel, Christmas lights inside and out, advent calendars, the precious nativity that Kris has today, lining up on Christmas morning according to height, Christmas eve turkey, ..and the list goes on.

I want you to know that I hear you in every verse of "O Holy Night", "What Childs Is This", "Do You Hear What I Hear?"....I hear your sarcasm in Brittany and Tod....I see your strength in Mei-Mei....your goofiness in Mike...your desire to play and be a part of the fun shines through Dawn...your hilarousness/silliness in Jay. I feel your touch with Karen....your tenderness with Brad...and your unconditional acceptance with Kris. Your determination lives on through Cole and Colin....your empathy shines through Craig and Alex....and your "take the bull by the horns"-ness is seen in Dylan. Thankfully, we see your beautiful face in Ethan.Your heart will forever be seen in Dad. I can not thank you enough for gifting all of us with a love for this holiday season. Through that love, we have all come to know, in our own time, love, and worship the most amazing and divine Gift ever given..all wrapped in swaddling clothes.

"It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes, or bags. And he puzzled and puzzled till his puzzler was sore. Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before. What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store? What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more?"
~Dr. Seuss

Preparation

We do a LOT of preparing in this household. We prepare lunches for school, prepare our clothes for the next school/work day, prepare the house for the arrival of guests, prepare food, prepare children, prepare for work...and the list goes on. Most of these things fall in to the mundane routine of our everyday lives, and quite honestly, are often taken for granted. The insurmountable time we spend is infinite it seems. This preparation theme alone has dominated my thoughts as of late. This inordinate amount of time is being spent on worldly things ~ disturbs me, and really caused me to stop and think about the very core of our existence and creation. Our only job here is to bring glory and praise to God. So whatever path God has blessed you with, your job remains the same....bring Him glory. Wow, in Cole's words a long time ago, I "suck out loud" at this. (And yes, he did get some soap in his mouth) And don't get me wrong, like you, I am so in love with God, and the things of God. I just do not give Him all of me, all the time....but I want to, and He is so deserving. The liturgical seasons are such a beautiful reminder of God's most Holy Gift, Himself. As my mom and dad used to say, "Prepare, and prepare well." As we are about to enter one of my most favorite liturgical seasons, Advent, I intend to prepare and prepare well as we...

Await the Celebration

happy almost Advent

WAR!!!

I feel like I need to gear up for war. Washing machine runs, but that's it. Dishwasher computer system is JACKED (Kar & Kris, that word was for you!) up and you never know if it is going to be YOUR lucky day and you can run it. Master bath sink has been out of commission for many, many, many months....and now the boys bathroom toilet needs to go (and does literally). Fridge freezes EVERY single morsel of food or liquid in it...even set on "1." I almost threw the rock solid ice ONION at someone tonight.... Virus on desktop and Craig's laptop...but I'm sure the computer virus fairy will come while we are working to fix them... Brakes on van (completely done and redone THREE times) still squeaking.

So, how's life with you?