How Sweet It Is

What a perfect title for this post...and what a great song! This weekend was fast, packed, and purposeful for all. For Tod it began with a boring drive from Ruston to Arlington....yes, that's right...not home first....to go to a football game with Miles. Tod and Miles have been friends since birth! Miles's mom, Jamie, and I were sorority sisters in college and ended up being pregnant at the same time! Tod and Miles were born four days apart. Naturally we did and still do so much together. Miles is a senior this year at Oakridge and Tod is desperately trying to talk Miles into switching from "I'm going to Baylor" to "I'm going to Louisiana Tech!"


Anyway, Tod had a great time catching up with friends. He walked through our door at 12:45 to Mike, Craig and me (who were about asleep on the couch!) Laundry, duffel bag and all!! It must have felt so so good to "fit" on a bed again!

Saturday started really early...especially when you go to bed at 1:30am and the alarm goes off at 6:30am! Tod had to be on the field for a kicking lesson at 8am. I can not effectively put in words what Scott Blanton (Yes...feels good tonight saying...former WASHINGTON REDSKIN kicker!) has meant to Tod.

Perhaps the LONG version of this story needs to be posted by Mike sometime...family and close friends KNOW...my post on Tod's senior year of high school football would cause many of you great concern and perhaps even frighten people. Anyway, Scott has given Tod what Mike and I were not able to, and certainly what his high school coach should have....belief not only in himself but in his ability. Tod is amazingly talented...especially when you consider that he had NEVER even been on a field OR kicked a football until his sophomore year. We were lead to Scott, who thankfully took Tod on, and it has been the best experience. Scott's way truly moves Tod. Those of you who have played competitive sports know just what I mean. One of his first quotes to Tod was, "Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard." And for Tod, not having had (yet) to work that hard to get as far as he already had, it was exactly what he needed to hear for the future. Scott is quiet, strong, and confident. He is skilled, observant, very patient, and fun. He has established a win-win relationship with Tod that has lifted him (and the football) to places we were not able to. John Wooden, former UCLA basketball coach and almost a "god" in this house, once said, "Some believe that sports build character. I believe sports reveal character." With the hand that Tod was dealt in high school, I am expotentially proud of the character that was revealed. He stood so tall and was the man. Well, Scott once told us, "I am surprised he has stayed in it with what he has been dealt." Again, Tod, that is a reflection of your character and resiliance.

Scott, we can not thank you enough for what you have done with and shown Tod. You are a big reason he is still in the game!!

And finally came Sunday morning!

Poor Tod...there was no "alone" time this weekend! He was surrounded, tackled, begged to play everything, and constantly held! Tod, know that we miss you so much already! I hope it feels so good to be "re-stocked", "buzzed" (the hair, that is), and "downy-ed!!" We are counting the days until you're home again....seventeen more days!

Overcast

Ever have one of those days that no matter how brightly the sun shines, it’s overcast in your head and heart? No matter how FULL and BLESSED your cup is, it still seems so empty and cursed. And despite your unmatched determination to change your forecast, you still come up rainy. Today has been one of those days for me. And you know, it never can be just that for me…an Eeyore-kind-of-day. Instead, I spend (and have spent today) an insurmountable amount of time trying to put my finger on why today is so gloomy. Is my aching tooth? Perhaps the tiff Tod and I had over the phone about directions home (imagine! I learned I ask too many questions!!)? Or maybe the discipline sheet Craig was given for “excessive talking?” Was it the CHECK ENGINE warning light on AGAIN in the van…after all, it’s only been 6K miles since the new transmission was put in? Better, was it finding out that Cole had told us, and his Aunt Karen, that he had gone a week with “no warnings” when truly he had received 1 to 2 warnings EVERYDAY last week? (Of course, Aunt Karen had already sent a congratulations card and gift ~ and just a side note here…going a WEEK without any warnings for talking (or as he sees it “I was just helping so-and-so”) for Cole is MONUMENTOUS, just ask Mrs. Arrington!! Who knows? My brain doesn't...but I do know who does know....my heart does, and it feels heavy and cloudy today.

T.G.I.F.

I truly laugh at myself tonight...counting days, hours, minutes....giddy about Friday!! What happens Friday you ask?

Tod comes home!!

I get butterflies thinking about it... I am so excited! Crazy sounding isn't it? I can't wait to be wrapped in his arms...I miss his touch, his way, his belly laugh, cuddling up next to him at 2 in the afternoon to wake him for the day, and his radiant smile! Already I'm going through a list of favorites to have around...as mom always did for us when we came home from school...favorite meals to fix, drinks, snacks, etc. I know the time will pass so quickly...but I will, I promise God, savor and be ever so thankful for each minute of having him here, again. Ahhhhh, it sounds so good. How long til summer?

Youth Sports

I coach soccer…and baseball… and basketball (in descending order of effectiveness.) I have been doing this on and off for about 25 years. (Scot Brown and I helped Gary Willis coach Shane’s Arlington Optimist baseball team when we were in college.) This weekend marked the start on Cole’s 2nd season of U6 soccer at the Y. At the coaches meeting I found out that they reduced the # of players on the field from 8 to 5 and also reduced the field size. When we showed up for the game I was a little upset, the field was about 20 yards long. My kids could score from the opposite goal. I started thinking, “They’ll play bunch ball.” “They won’t keep their spacing and positioning.” “They will forget how to pass.” The field was so small they weren’t even going to call offsides, for crying out loud! How are these kids supposed to learn how to play the game correctly!?! We work hard at practice to help these little guys and girls learn the right way to play. Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not a win-at-all-costs type of coach. I truly believe and practice the mantra that the #1 rule of youth sports is to have fun. If they are having fun, learning the game and listening to their coaches, everything else will take care of itself.

But I also feel that learning the game is important. They need to be able to pass with either foot, stay in position and do a throw-in with both feet on the ground. I actually had a couple parents saying it was a waste of time playing on a field this small. Then I saw one of my players who hardly moved in the first quarter go hard after the ball in the fourth, I saw everybody raise their hand to be goalie just so they could wear the cool colored jersey, I saw Cole pull his shirt over his head and do the “airplane” after he scored, I saw our team line up and slap hands and say good game to the other team and I saw them more excited about the Gatorade and Cheez-Its than they were for the game.

If they can only pass with one foot and they jump in the air every time they throw it in, but they want to stay on the field for 30 minutes after practice is over and they help their teammates up after a hard play and they want to keep playing together because they’re having fun, I guess I can live with a small field.

Batter Up!

Photos by Aunt Krissy

Tod leaving for college has affected all of us. Interestingly, each one of us has found, or is working on finding, our unique way of coping with this new stage in the Pfaff household life. I never imagined that Reed, our baby, would truly suffer as I have, hurting and longing for his “Tod-o.” Reed’s teacher, Ms. Amy, is amazing and so tender about giving Reed an abundance of TLC while at school, and truly taking a partnership role in aiding us in helping Reed adjust. There are days that she often hears, “My Tod is gone”,…and in his perspective I think he thinks he’s gone forever. I am so grateful for her tender ways of handling his “broken” heart at times.

Cole has been affected the least but the most positively in that he just looks forward to the next time we are going out to see Tod and can’t WAIT for him to start kicking footballs for Louisiana Tech! We attended Jesuit’s football game last night and Cole felt 18 himself as he shook hands with some of Tod’s 08 classmates who stayed local for college. He is “keeping up” with the guys for Tod while he’s away. He told Tod on the cell phone who he spoke to…calling them all by just their last name…hilarious!

And then, there’s my Craig-o. I cry just typing as I THINK about him. He is, like Tod, so strong yet has always had an unmatched and amazing amount of compassion and empathy. He is tender-hearted and huge hearted all at once. He is quiet about his feelings, and often sits back to just listen. Without a doubt he will be as gifted as his dad in his passion for listening…something I need to do so much more of. When asked, “How is Craig handling Tod being gone?” both Mike and I are quick to answer…he’s doing okay. Truly the excitement of getting his own room overshadowed the emptiness that no doubt has now settled in. But that is the biggest blessing about Craig and truly one of his many strengths…his ability to just go with the flow…very flexible and accommodating…always. He has slipped into this “biggest” brother role with ease and in a way that not only makes us proud but I know it would and will make Tod proud. While on a walk the other night Mike told both Cole and Reed that they had to hold one of our hands …Craig’s, mom’s, or dad’s because we were on a busy street….both Cole and Reed ran to Craig…one on each hand. Mike and I quietly walked behind, tearing up,…with the imagine of Craig holding on to each of his brothers….just as Tod had proudly held on to him many years ago. He, like both Mike and I who had “saint-like” examples and huge footsteps to follow in when Paul and Karen left home, has stepped up to the plate ready….ready for any kind of pitch that life will throw him. God is responsible for his readiness. We are just blessed to be part of the team. We are so proud of you and love you beyond words, Craig, and know that God has amazing plans for you. “ Knock it out of the park!!!”

September 11, 2008

Patriotic Day

We honored those whose lives were lost seven years ago today, those who lost love ones, those men and women who serve our great country, and for those who lead and will lead our country.

Who has time to read?

It really amazes me how much I can accomplish in an afternoon. And why me? Why do I have this unmatched, inhuman desire to plow through things and get stuff done ~ like, off my list permanently. And, why is it that Mike, or any other male (besides Chris and David), can’t or quite frankly don’t WANT to accomplish the same amount of stuff? While driving to pick up my two boys from Mary Immaculate I am calling parents of students whose behavior warranted a parent phone call. I pick up my boys and begin the vocabulary review/reading homework while driving home. Upon arriving and assigning stuff for each to carry in (especially if I have grocery shopped on the way home….I hate it!), I let Lady out, change clothes, direct the boys with our “getting home, getting ready for the next day routine of chores”, and begin the “sit down and concentrate” homework help. Meanwhile, Reed has either used the restroom on the floor of the bathroom (yesterday, because a gecko ran across his feet) or Lady has thrown up something she shouldn’t have eaten. Quickly I get laundry started and I am usually answering comprehension questions while scrubbing the bathroom floor...or wood floor...whichever has been “hit” by Reed or Lady. Still working on homework I wonder what in the world will I fix for dinner???? I long for a plate of veggies and fruit, or Mike’s grilled chicken….but know that I would only be cooking for TWO and there are FIVE of us here that need nutrition. I hate the dinner thing. My guys live on pizza, cereal, nuggets, pizza, cereal, nuggets, and pizza. AHH! Sadly, the figuring out of the dinner usually gets left behind. I attempt to control the amount of paper work… which I must say I am failing at. The STACK of to do’s in the pile of paperwork saved in the kitchen is the size of the Dallas Yellow Pages book! I hate it and truthfully just want to SHRED the entire stack despite it’s importance. I crack myself up…and yet get driven CRAZY…like real people crazy…by my piles of “to do’s.” This needs to go to the dry cleaners, this needs to go to the alteration lady, this needs to go to storage, I need to call and get this refilled, sign up for soccer, get the stuff for “Feed the Hungry” at our boys school, and THE LIST (thanks Allyson!) grows and grows!! So much so that I want to SHRED it too! You know, I can hear someone advising…slow down, take some time for yourself, just leave it for tomorrow…really? Come on, you and I both know THAT flat out does not work. Am I alone in this world??? No, no. Rest assured some of my closest friends travel in this boat with me everyday! In fact the captain of this vessel was for many years (and can still be…. :) ) the “boss” of me…but certainly my second lifeline behind Mickey, Karen! We are on a FANTASTIC VOYAGE aren’t we? Just thought I’d blog about what I do…while Mike reads.

Reading

I really like to read. Kim, not so much. I tend to go in spurts though. Long periods where I sit and veg out watching reruns of Seinfeld and Scrubs, then I’ll pick up a book and start ripping through them like there’s no tomorrow. I am in a book ripping period. I’ve read books on religion, business and politics in the last month. I just finished one and am looking for my next. I browsed the shelves in my den, couldn’t find anything that I felt called to read. There are 3-4 that I want to read, but now doesn’t seem right or them, you know? I can look at a book, know I want to read it but also know that I am not in the frame of mind for it. I am sure most readers are like that.

I went to Barnes and Noble and browsed, same thing happened. Lots of prospects, nothing jumped out at me. Now I can feel the literary fire starting to fade. I need help. If anyone can recommend a good book, I’d appreciate it. Only a few stipulations, not a fan of romance novels and can do without the vampires (sorry Kricky). Thanks in advance for the help.

Bye Tod-o

We returned late Sunday evening from Ruston, Louisiana…Home of the Bulldogs. FIVE people, ONE car, no fridge, no microwave, no laptop or printer, no sheets or towels, and no Tod-o. Not only was our load lighter, but our hearts were emptier too. I truly struggle to find the adequate words that describe my experience this weekend. I know one thing for sure….it hurt then, is still hurting tonight, and it slams you to your knees. My conversations with God have varied…desperation, anger, elation, and most importantly, “Hold me up!” The physical ache just takes your breath away. Never before have I had that overwhelming desire to just jump out of the van and run to him…just for one more hug and hold.


This was my last image as we pulled ever so slowly out of the parking lot in front of Tod’s dorm. No further words are even necessary.




Thank you, all of you, who have read this and prayed for our #1. He is who he is because you are who you are…and you ALL have had an important impact on his life, directly or indirectly. We are grateful be sure.

Tod-o, you know I ache in missing you. May I just leave you with a quote from the book that Mr. & Mrs. Moore gave you at graduation:

It takes courage to think alone, to resist alone, to stand alone-
Especially when the crowd seems so safe, so right.

You HAVE shown us time and time again that courage. You have the tools, the intelligence, the support, the God-given gifts…. NOW is your time!

I love you,
Mom